Right in the middle wedged in between Ireland and East Scotland is the Welsh stand which is

Right in the middle, wedged in between Ireland and East Scotland, is the Welsh stand which is so small that it resembles a kiosk. Indeed, more than one person has been turned away this week when asking for “a Mars bar and 20 Bensons, please”. Why is the stand so small? “We don’t really need to plug God’s Country,” came the reply. But even the Creator knows he will have to promote Paradise’s courses if he ever wants golf fans to go there…*There are plenty of things the Honourable Company of Edinburgh Golfers don’t allow in their club – women, juniors, crocodiles, tarantulas – but they have, however grudgingly, allowed the members of press to use their clubhouse this week. It has been an uneasy alliance, as one member showed when saying to an acquaintance, loudly: “Why do the press get the run of the place? Look at them – they’re like bloody vermin.” Short of putting pellets down, one way the members have struck back has been by putting up a rope up directly outside the bar window. Here the press had gathered on Thursday to – shock, horror – watch the golf.

But the members in the bar were furious that their view of the 18th green was being blocked. One of the ‘Crevat Crew’ rapped on the window before shouting: “Out of the way, God damn you – I can’t see.” Darren Clarke, at that moment hunched over a tricky four-foot putt, was fortunate not to be put off. But we cannot have the honourable members put off their Pimms now, can we?*They say that rematches are never as good and so it proved yesterday with Colin Montgomerie and Rob Nothman. On Thursday, after a 74, the ‘Full-of-it Monty’ had told Nothman to go away in exceptionally unflattering terms as the Radio 5 Live interviewer was attempting to go about his work But after yesterday’s 64 he was sweetness personified.

“I hope to be talking to you on Sunday evening,” said the beaming Scot to him. What a difference 10 shots make.*One of the great sights these past two days has been the Amateur champion, Alejandro Larrazabal (left), smacking hell out of the ball and then his brother-cum-caddy sprinting into the undergrowth to find it. It has been golf’s very own version of ‘Fetch’ but sadly Pedro’s breathless excursions have all been in vain as his older brother limped out with a 77, a 75 and an empty ball bag yesterday. As the Amateur champion, Alejandro is invited to compete in next year’s Masters at Augusta but Pedro had better leave his trainers behind “We don’t allow running,” an Augusta spokesman said.. Nobody speaks with greater passion about the urgent need to reduce the advantage now held by big hitters in professional golf than Nick Price, whose doggedly combined 70 at Muirfield yesterday kept him well in contention for the Open Championship. “To my mind, this game has always been David and Goliath contests,” he said, “Gary Player coming up against Jack Nicklaus, Ben Hogan playing Sam Snead, in more recent times, Nick Faldo and Corey Pavin against Greg Norman.